


French Tip

by aguwustdick (sugandrew), beary_scary



Series: A Simple Spoonful [8]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Ben is a Good Brother, Bonding, Five needs a hug, Friendship, Honey understands, Klaus is a good brother, Mentions of The Handler, Phobia of Touch, She was really creepy, Spa Day! (kinda), for real, you can not convince me otherwise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2020-01-05 08:16:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18362144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sugandrew/pseuds/aguwustdick, https://archiveofourown.org/users/beary_scary/pseuds/beary_scary
Summary: Klaus and Honey get their nails done and Five goes with them. Shit happens.





	French Tip

**Author's Note:**

> Hey so brief warning: The Handler is a really creepy gal and that is touched upon in this fic. She was very touchy with Five and that is talked about. 
> 
> I hope you like it!!!!

Honey’s week had been non-stop, A Simple Spoonful had been full during all of her shifts until she closed and Bat got sick while Katie was at work so she had to take him to the vet.

By the end of the week, she looked and felt like she was swimming in molasses.

So when Klaus said that he was going to get his nails done Five asks as nonchalantly as possible if Honey and he could go. His brother’s face lit up and nodded enthusiastically. 

“Yes, of course! Tell her it’s on me!” Oh, the magic words, he thought as his only worry about the entire plan flew away, Honey will relax a lot more if she didn’t have to think about how she would eat instant ramen for a week.

So he calls her to let her know that Klaus invited her to get a manicure (and by invited he meant that he paid) and she sighed and said yes. Five imagined her nodding to the phone and let out the smallest laugh disguised as a cough, but Honey knew him enough and celebrated as much as she could in her state. 

“I’ll be there before you can blink.” Her enthusiasm was palpable under her sleepiness.

“Don’t use the motorcycle, you’ll fall asleep and crash.” He said it almost as a joke.  _ Almost. _

“Don’t tell me what to do, kid.” But her tone said he’d won. She cleared her throat. “Bye, Five. I’ll see you in an hour.” 

“Bye, Honey.” She always said goodbye. They hung up at the same time.

A knock on the door let him know his friend was there, and he pretended he wasn’t running to open it before any of his siblings did. She probably wasn’t in the mood to interact with them.

Klaus is in his room but when he hears the creak of the knob he realized she had arrived.

He went to the door to greet her but stopped in the middle of the hallway to see the scene developing in front of him.

Honey was hiding a smile behind her hand as she was telling something to Five, who looked annoyed. Her hand went to his shoulder but when she realized she changed the trajectory and ruffled his hair instead. He tried to escape and his friend laughed. 

“I just witnessed something beautiful.” The thirty-year-old said.

“No, you _ interrupted _ something beautiful.” Ben corrected him.

He takes a deep breath and goes pretending he saw nothing and almost yelled a greeting as he hugged the barista, her smile grew as she replied, tone lower than his. 

When they arrive at the salon and the employees welcome Klaus like a friend, and for some reason neither of the pair of friends are surprised.

Five refuses to have someone he doesn’t know touching his hands (what if it’s someone sent by The Commission and incapacitates them so they can attack his family?) so he just sits by Honey’s side and talks with her.

Klaus insists on getting her acrylic nails so she reluctantly agrees. They’re not really convenient with her field of work. 

When they’re finished the old man-child looks at his friend’s hands and recognition flashes throughout his mind.

Red claws on his face and shoulders, a venomous smile that didn’t reach her eyes.

Those were the only times he wanted to have a gun in his hand and a telescopic sight on his eye if that would take him away from her.

Everything got dark, then too bright until he felt something kicking his foot.

Honey was looking at him, worry shining in her eyes like a beacon. He returns the look and they silently agree to talk about it later. 

Five can see his brother in the background, lost and out of place, so he asks him a stupid question. His problems shouldn’t ruin his day. His friend put on her Barista Smile™ and he put on his mask the best that he could. 

“Something happened,” Ben said in his brother’s ear. 

_ No shit _ , Klaus thought but answered with a small nod. 

So they left. 

Honey’s hands were in her pockets the entire way from the place to the mansion, and the oldest(?) of the group walked a little slower to talk with his dead brother and give the other two space.

“Something happened to Five there,” Ben repeated.

“I know, I’m not an idiot.” His brother stared at him. “Okay, I am an idiot but not  _ that  _ much.”

A little bit ahead of them the barista and the old man were quiet, and that’s how they stayed until they got to the Hargreeves’ home. 

Five made an attempt to go upstairs with Number Four but a cough stopped him.

“Hey, buddy.” Honey said. “Can you be alone or do you want to come to the kitchen with me?” As a reply, Five looked down.

“Eh.” 

“‘Eh’ is not an answer.” She said, and he tried to apologize. “No. No apologies. You’re coming with me.” He nodded and allowed her to lead him. 

In the kitchen, the twenty-three-year-old was making coffee as the old man-child looked at her, expressionless. 

“Hey, Five.” A voice took him out of his thoughts. “Do you want to talk about what happened over there?” He cleared his throat, swallowed then coughed again. 

“It was my former employer.” He looked at his shoes, unable to say anything else.

Honey poured coffee in two mugs but didn’t give him one. He was going to ask why but he saw his hands. He was shaking. 

She guided him to a chair, sat him down and kneeled in front of him.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” For some reason, that sentence frustrated him. He wanted to tell her. He just couldn’t. He shook his head in response.

“She had acrylic nails. They were red, like blood. She really liked blood.” And me, he thought. “She touched my face a lot, and it hurt. She grabbed my shoulders and they burned. I don’t know if that has to do with the damn claws she had, but they didn’t help.” He looked away. “The only moments where I wanted to have a gun in my hands was when I was with her.” His friend nodded, understanding. 

“Thank you for telling me.” She locked at him and knew that it was time to change the subject. “Did I tell you what Bat did today? I almost killed him.” The fifty-eight-year-old stared at her, interested in what she had to say. “That little bitch made a mess in the hour where Katie was gone and I was sleeping, so I had a beautiful surprise waiting for me in the living room when I woke up.” She laughed. “I had to tidy the place up while I was having breakfast and right after I took a shower. It was a mess.” 

Five tried to smile. Not because he meant it, but because he needed to calm Honey down. She may sound calm but her eyes were full on alert. After a few more minutes of that and a lot of stories about the businessmen that came with expensive suits and demanded something the cheap-ish coffee shop couldn’t give him, the barista considered her friend was good enough to give him the lukewarm cup of coffee.

The wariness in her eyes calmed down when she saw he was feeling better, and she would’ve hugged him, but he didn’t look like he wanted a hug. 

 


End file.
